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Located in the center of Improbable Island, nearly due north of NewHome and to the west of Kittania, Improbable Central is both the capital of the Island and the hub of its commerce and social life. Rumor has it that all rumors start here and are approved by an unrevealed government agency before being released to contestants through Dan at the Prancing SpiderKitty.

Additionally, the Island's major scientists have their secret enclave here, where they devote their time to developing new weapons, such as the chainsaw, for use by contestants. Clans often steal these prototypes before they are ready for general release and can be seen running amok through the streets of the Island's cities with everything from radioactive cheese sprayers to rainbow-colored Molotov cocktail mixers. Ask around for the Science Center - If you can find it, maybe you'll be able to buy a devastating weapon prototype1).

Major attractions in Improbable Central include:

  • The Stocks. Nope2)
  • The Statue. Also Nope
  • Deimos' Haberdashery. Deimos is a master hat-maker. His wares are expensive, but his customer list includes some of the Island's most dashing citizens. No one is quite sure what purpose his hats serve, but they sure are cute. Deimos ONLY ACCEPTS REQUISITION. Any mention of “Gold” is a sign of Seth's counterfeit currency. Please report problems like this to the Watch.
  • Oliver's Jewelry. Another master artisan, Oliver makes a variety of jewelry with precious stones from the Island's mines.3) His wares are expensive, but the craftsmanship and the figure you'll cut striding through town wearing his jewels make them well worth the cost. According to rumor, his jewelry provides protection against some types of monster, but more recent research has proven it just makes you more attractive to Thieving Squat Bastards. Oliver believes that the Island is ruled by a king.
  • Cadfael's Furniture . Cadfael sells furniture you can install in your dwelling. You can buy everything from a Couch, Folding bed or Single Bed. Cadfael also has the ability to customize your furniture, for a small extra fee.
  • Suzie's Hardware . Suzie is in charge of Places. She can sell you a stake for 100 cigarettes, and will happily rent out toolboxes for Carpentry, Masonry or Decorating, at the cost of 1 cig per day.
  • Petra's Tattoo Parlor. Petra offers some of the best tattoo art on the Island. Symbols, tigers, hummingbirds - she does it all. Her work is affordable but her shop could be more sanitary.4)
  • The Prancing SpiderKitty. Improbable Central's favourite pub. A regular visit to the PSK is vital to your survival on Improbable Island. Get drunk! Gamble all your cigarettes! Flirt with the Staff! Listen to the Bard!
  • Curious Looking Rock. Magical forces prevent new contestants from seeing this fixture of the city's landscape for what it is. For the lucky few who have the experience, gatherings at the Curious Looking Rock are events to be remembered.
  • The Old Church. Nope
  • Villager's Hut. The old woman who lives in this tiny hut in the city's western residential quadrant is seldom seen but is renown for her generosity. She prepares bags of healthy candies and cookies for the city's children, and has been known to allow older contestants to sample a bag or two as well. But don't be greedy - you know what your mother told you about eating too much candy before storming into the jungle to fight monster. A couple of bags may give you a sugar rush, but too many will make you sick.5)

Improbable Central is a bustling place, full of contestants coming and going, and Island officials hustling through on their various errands of Island business. Travelers should sure to have their caricature drawn by local artists beside the statute of the Island's latest hero in the town square - and be sure to check out the stocks. The city's tallest spires offer terrific views of the forests to the east and southwest, as well as the swamps and river to the north. Head out from Improbable Central in any direction, and adventure awaits!

Unless, of course, someone has already stolen it.
Though you might find the cousin somewhere in NewHome
He denies that the improbability that infuses the Island has affected these stones in any way, and any reports to the contrary are nothing but lies.
Reports of massive blood and hit point loss are common.
It is recommended to eat two candies, and then eat two more. Eating three or four at a time can may result in baaaaad things.
improbable_central.txt · Last modified: 2023/11/21 18:03 by

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