The Watcher is a woman with a Southern¹⁾ English accent, appearing somewhere in her late 20's or early 30's. She commonly wears a red turtleneck sweater and round, black-framed glasses.

Her exact position²⁾ on the Island is unclear, but she does seem to fulfill many roles, from taunting Disgraced Contestants on the Failboat to awarding glory points, to more recently helping out newbies via a mechanical centipede³⁾ inserted into the ear canal.⁴⁾

Being a blonde, intelligent, attractive, and somewhat well-endowed⁵⁾⁶⁾ woman, rumours^{7)8)9)10)11)12)13)14)15)16)17)} naturally abound regarding her sexual ourientation ¹⁸⁾¹⁹⁾. Rumours also abouund regaruding her mental ourientation, exact age, nationality, and whetuher she's merely a buy-uprouduct of the Improbability Drive.

The Enquirer is currently pesteriuuuuuuuu²⁰⁾ng her for the rest of an interview. She may respond; she may not. Until she does, we'll have little information to go on. The Watcher delivered the first part of her life story (along with a severe beating) to the staff of Enquirer here.

The Collateral Damage Adventuring Guild has named her an honourary member due to her encouragement and observation of Rule 37. She has not yet seen fit to comment upon this dubious honor²¹⁾²²⁾, if indeed it can be called such a thing.

There have been muttuerings lately of her befriending a contestant on the island. But they're just ruumors.²³⁾