The ICEE Buff Party
Was, well. Quite insane.
However, due to certain issues, all proper documentations have been lost.1)
Instead, here is a witness' account of what had happened.
~FIRST INTERVIEW~
“State your name for the record, sir.”
“Rhee-muhz.”
“Remus where were you the day of the ICEE party?”
“Thuh 'ouse.”
“Which house?”
“Mine.”
“Annnd which house is that?”
“Kreem-zun Blayd.”
“Right then. Can you tell me what happened?”
“Gawt an-ee cook-eez?”
“No?”
~END TRANSMISSION, DUE TO INTERVIEWER SUCCUMBING TO PUMMELING~
~SECOND INTERVIEW~
“State your name?”
“Wouldn't you like to know.”
“Please, miss, just tell me your name. This is for my report.”
“What's the report on? Physics?”
“No? It's for-”
YELLING: “MATH! RIGHT? IT HAS TO BE MATH THIS TIME.”
“No!”
SCREAMING INCOHERENTLY: “AMERICAN SIGN LANGUAGE?”
“No! It's for a party! Your husband is the founder of the ICEE clan?”
“Oh. That. Well. Fine, I guess. Okay. So what did you wanna know, then?”
“Can you tell me what happened?”
“Yes. Yes I can.”
THIRTY MINUTE SILENCE
“Would you like to tell me, miss?”
“Maybe.”
TEN MINUTE SILENCE
“Are you going to say anything about it?”
“Are you going to give me some money?”
“No?”
“Then we're done here.”
~END TRANSMISSION~
~THIRD INTERVIEW~2)
“Name sir?”
“Bob Staffleton.”
“Tell me about what happened at the castle for the ICEE party.”
“Dude I heard you interviewed my friend and my wife. How'd that go?”
“Well, I've been suffering from severe headaches, and I would not like to see another blonde for a long time.”
CHUCKLES: “Oh that sucks. Sorry buddy.”
SIGHS: “Can you just tell me what happened, please? I have to file this thing tomorrow.”
“Yeah sure.”
“Really?”
“Mhm.”
“Oh! Okay. Uhh. . . Did you get a look of all the other witnesses and victims?”
“Yeah. Well. Sorta. There were about fifty people there. Familiar faces and all, and some new ones. Friends of mine too.”
“Did you get a good look at anyone?”
“Well sure. But that was a while ago, and I can't remember everyone's costumes.”
“Costumes?”
“Yeah. It was a Halloween party too. Figured it'd be a good theme. I was a werewolf.”
SIGHS. AGAIN: “Okay, anyway. What happened?”
“People came. We were going to have some dinner in the dining room, and then dance.”
“Okay.”
“Well we have some dinner, and then some weird things started happening.”
“Weird things?”
“Yeah. People kept getting covered in bedsheets. And after that would happen, they'd start acting like ghosts, I think.”
“Were they dead?”
“Nono. But they kind of acted like they were. Eventually we caught the person who was sheeting everyone and locked her up.” “After that, the remaining folks just stuck around and danced for awhile. The whole thing was kinda fun.”
“Wait a minute. You mean to tell me nobody actually died?”
“Not that I know of. And I'd probably be informed if anyone did.”
“Oh bloody Hell.”
~END TRANSMISSION, DUE TO INTERVIEWER STOMPING OUT~