ii-murderous-rampage.user.js

// ==UserScript==
// @name            ii-murderous-rampage
// @namespace       enquirer.improbableisland.com/dokuwiki/doku.php?id=greasemonkey
// @match           *://*.improbableisland.com/*
// @exclude         *://enquirer.improbableisland.com/*
// @description     does fights forever (auto-fighing, if need-be). Declines most Improbable Events (accepts a couple good ones). Works in the Jungle, DB, etc.
// @icon            http://improbableisland.com/favicon.ico
// @version         2.0
// @author          Full Metal Lion
// @grant           none
// ==/UserScript==
console.log("ii-murderous-rampage here");
 
let onlyFightIfWeHaveCats = false; //replace "false" with "true" here to only fight if you have cats
 
ops = [
  "search&stam=search", //look for trouble
  "search&type=slum", //easy fight
  "search&type=thrill", //big trouble
  "search&type=suicide", //really big trouble
  "search", //fight in FailBoat
  "fight&auto=full", //auto-fight Until Somebody Drops
  "fight&auto=ten", //if full is unavailable, like in DB
  "no", //cryptic riddle guy, iirc
  "ignoreferryman", //ferryman
  "back", //rps mutant, iirc
  "leave", //trail
  "leavestonehenge", //stonehenge
  "swing", //pinata yes (comment this out to not swing at the pinata)
  "noswing", //pinata no
  "chicken", //strange old man
  "dont", //broth joker
  "play", //crazy audrey yes
  "run", //crazy audrey no
  "pre", //begin mighty magpie and tattoo mutant fight
  "wait", //tattoo mutant yes / DB "Hang on just a moment"
  "flee", //tattoo mutant no
  "nextfight" //the game is forcing you into another fight in DB or possibly a Breach
];
 
function catcheck(){ //check if we have cats
  let ret = false;
  let typesOfCats = ["Angry Cats", "SpiderKitties and Fuel for the SpiderKitty Launcher"];
  for (let c of typesOfCats){
    ret = ret || (document.getElementById("stat_buffs").innerHTML.indexOf(c)!= -1);
  } 
  return ret; 
}
 
if ( onlyFightIfWeHaveCats || catcheck() ){
  for (let op of ops){
    console.log("looking for: "+op);
    url = document.querySelector('a[href*="op='+op+'"]');
    console.log("found: "+url);
    if(url){//must check for falsiness or else a null will crash the program here
      window.location.href = url;//go directly to the url we found
      break; //do not pass go do not collect $200
      //if you don't include break then this script will continue and go to the wrong links
    }
  }
}

Fun fact: Full Metal Lion, as part of a plot to attain the longest title in the game, once created a variant of this script called “ii-murderous-salesman” that went in and out of The Prancing SpiderKitty looking for the shady salesman. However, that variant has been lost to time, and wasn't really very useful except in that niche case, anyway.

Full Metal Lion also once created a script called ii-done-bellow– initially based on ii-to-fuck but later refactored to be based on ii-murderous-rampage– that allowed the user to “Sit in Down Below like a fat little spider, killing anything that wanders into you”. He later combined ii-done-bellow into version 2 of ii-murderous-rampage.