This is Scene 1 of The Riddler of Oz, presented by the Weathervane Players in NewHome on December 13, 2008 (GMT -5).

(2h26m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell clears his throat. “A-hem! Sounding off now, actors!
(2h21m) <SPOON> Count Sessine says, “Present.”
(2h20m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell opens the present and hands out the popcorn contained within.
(2h11m) The wizened old woman accepts a bag of popcorn, takes one piece, then hands the bag to a nearby Newbie. “Too much salt,” she grumbles.
(2h9m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell slaps his head and turns to the audience, “I almost forgot! For all you Newbies out there, the first performance of the “Weathervane Players” shall soon be commencing.”
(2h6m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan says, “Present!”
(2h6m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell continues, “As such, asking questions pertaining to the game will become temporarily impossible. We ask for your forbearance, and recommend sitting back and enjoying the show.”
(2h3m) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth says, “uhm. . . here?”
(2h3m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan notices he still needs to get into costume. He pulls out some dice, then rolls them. They turn into a severed arm. “Hmm. . . Perfect.” He gives an evil smile then transforms into a jokerzombie.
(2h1m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll rushes in breathless.
(2h1m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll says, “I'm here!”
(2h) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell turns to Carroll, “Ah! Excellent! Now, is anyone missing?
(2h) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan also stuffs a gag into Fergus's mouth. Fergus goes, “Mrmph! Rur rur murr rur mrmph?”
(1h59m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan says, “Sorry kid, but you can object later.” TMM then runs behind stage, fully in costume.
(1h56m) <SPOON> Count Sessine wonders aloud, “Is Bob ready?”
(1h56m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell glances around curiously. “Perhaps we should have had someone carry him. . .Moving around without legs would make it difficult to get anywhere. . .”
(1h48m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll pokes her head out from behind the curtain.
(1h47m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll comes on to the stage, in costume.
(1h47m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll sings, “Where, oh where, has my little skull/dog gone. . .Oh where, oh where can he be???
(1h46m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll sings, “With 'is ears not there and his eyeballs all red, oh WHERE OH WHERE CAN HE BE!!!”
(1h46m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell turns to the other performers. “If he can't make it, we shall need doubling up. First Midget part, and Toto. Who wants to be an understudy?”
(1h44m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell adds, “Also, where's Obsidian?”
(1h42m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell looks at the cast sheet, “Only Tor NaGoth, Sessine and Wizened Old Woman can double.”
(1h39m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan pokes his head out onstage. “Fergus and I could actually do both midgets. I have enough time to roll into the role.” TMM is hit with a tomato for the pun.
(1h37m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell thinks, I think I could take either remaining part after re-reading the lines, so someone else pick one.
(1h34m) <SPOON> Count Sessine makes a small gesture, and suddenly looks much more like a regal kittymorph than any Joker has a right to. “I'll handle Obsidian's part if he's not here by showtime.”
(1h33m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll says, “Wasn't it showtime forty minutes ago?”
(1h31m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell goes slightly pale, “Then, I'm. . .Oh dear.” Max fishes around and grabs his narrator hat. After a bit more searching, he locates a skull cap. He stares at it dubiously.
(1h30m) <SPOON> Count Sessine whispers, “Sssh! They won't know unless you tell them!” Then he looks around and realizes it's already too late to keep that secret.
(1h29m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell checks his sundial. Since it is pointing straight up, it must be around show-time.
(1h27m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell starts dancing to entertain the audience. “So when shall 'showtime' be?”
(1h26m) <SPOON> Count Sessine says, “Everyone have a copy of the script handy? Let's get this show going. Max, you're on.”
(1h24m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell puts on his narrator hat.
(1h23m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as narrator says, “Welcome, one and all, to the Weathervane Players rendition of “The Riddler of Oz” Act One! Today's show was sponsored by newbie Olliepuck.”
(1h22m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as narrator, “As our story begins, Newbie Dorothy wanders about NewHome, jaw agape, carrying a little dog who looks rather like a skull with glowing eye sockets.”
(1h22m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy says slowly, “Toto, I. . . don't think we're in Kansas any more.”
(1h20m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull - as Toto yips cutely, trying hard to give the impression of a small fluffy dog. He gives up and says, “No kidding, sweetheart. What the hell?”
(1h19m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy turns around, taking in NewHome. “That Gatekeeper was weird, wasn't he, Toto?”
(1h19m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a skull as Toto growls, “Couldn't spell, either, the idiot. But the implant crew. . . what did you pick?”
(1h18m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy says, “The StimExcel Neural Enhancement Rig. It seemed, um, safer. You?”
(1h16m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll says, “There will be a momentary lapse in conversation as Max has reached his comment limit.”
(1h16m) The wizened old woman looks up and grimly shakes her fist at someone. “You and your Rules! Can't you ease up here, just for once?”
(1h15m) <SPOON> Audacious IonicField says, “Darn. And also, huzzah!”
(1h15m) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth fumbles around behind the scenes, looking for his script.
(1h14m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan says, “We shall fill this void with entertaining dancing.” TMM dances around the stage, losing an arm in the process. “Drat!”
(1h13m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan grabs his arm and runs back behind stage to reattach it.
(1h13m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto pushes them off-stage, wanting the spotlight and says, “I chose the other one.”
(1h13m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy looks down at Toto in her arms. “The. . . oh. That one. Maybe that's why you seem so. . .”
(1h13m) <SPOON> Audacious IonicField says, “Devilishly attractive?”
(1h12m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto says, “So. . . . what?. . . Manly?”
(1h12m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy shakes her head. “Never mind. The important thing is, we've got to get out of here. I need to go home right away - - before Aunty Em finishes counting those chicks.”
(1h11m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell throws his narrator hat back on, and as Narrator says, “Dorothy now attempts to get somebody to talk to her, but most of the people here are as disoriented as she is, and no help at all.”
(1h10m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan comes up behind her. “So what's the problem, kid?”
(1h10m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy gives a little scream. “A- a- are you a. . .” He sure looks like a zombie, all rotting flesh, but maybe he isn't one, really. Like Toto isn't really a. . .
(1h10m) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth can be heard from off stage “Found it!”
(1h10m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan winks at her. “A zombie? Yeah, thought I'd try it for a while. BRAAAAAINS! See? And you're a Newbie. What do you want to know?”
(1h8m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto says, “Gotta admire a man who can talk after he's dead. Like me.”
(1h8m) <KATS> Badass haykii says, “Ciggies at Newhome only 9k”
(1h7m) <KATS> Badass haykii says, “Ciggies at Newhome only 9k”
(1h6m) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto adds, “Unlike a certain haykii, who's going to get PVP'ed to next thursday at this rate! Max snaps at him.”
(1h5m) The wizened old woman taps haykii on the shoulder and says “Shush, child! There's a play going on here!”
(1h3m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy promptly says, “How to get home to Kansas.”
(1h2m) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan looks dubious. “Kansas? I don't think that's possible, hon. You could check the Newbie Advisory at http://tinyurl.com/newbieadvisory. He shambles off.
(1h1m) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy picks up a piece of TheMuffinMan that fell off. A finger. She throws it after him. “I'm not your hon! And you're no help. Old Stinky.”
(1h) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth says, “Have a heart. If he heard that, you might hurt his feelings.”
(1h) <SPOON> Audacious IonicField asks, “Can I help, dear?”
(59m54s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy pouts. “I just want to go hoooome! Aunty Em's going to be so mad. And nobody here will help me.”
(59m34s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth looks about as uncomfortable as a Gobot can look. His Shiny Chrome frame twists about on his knobby tires. “Don't cry, little girl. I'll help you, if I can.”
(59m25s) <SPOON> Audacious IonicField says, “Sweetie, I don't think WE can get you home. . .”
(59m9s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy eyes the Gobot doubtfully. “Can you send me back to Kansas?”
(59m2s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth says sadly, “No. Nobody can do that. But if you buy from the Scavenger's workshop over there, and don't go to Sheila, I'll give you some really good armor.”
(58m35s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy tosses her head scornfully. “Armor! What would I want with armor? If I'm to get home before dinner, there's no time to play Mister Dressup.”
(57m50s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth watches as she stalks impatiently off. If Gobots could shrug, he definitely would. Some Newbies just won't be told. He wheels away.
(57m44s) <SPOON> Audacious IonicField says, “Ah, but you'll need the armour on your travels to seek the one person that can possibly help you.”
(57m22s) <SWEET> Transcendent Almighty Empress of Improbability with Holy Cheese and a Side of Badass Fries Severa does a rhythm-lacking and mildly hilarious dance in the middle of the village in homage to the Hedgehogs. . .
(56m51s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto watches after him, “Hmmm. Wheels and armor and hedgehogs. . . Now there's an idea I like!”
(56m20s) <SPOON> Count Sessine in kittymorph guise is idly toying with a piece of string when Dorothy comes to stand in front of him, arms akimbo. “So are you going to help,” she demands. “Help with what?” he inquires.
(56m3s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy says, “Help me get off the Island and back to Kansas, of course.”
(54m30s) <SPOON> Count Sessine, catlike, surveys this phenomenon. One can meet anything in the Jungle, of course, but belligerent little girls demanding the impossible are not so common in NewHome. He decides to ignore her.
(53m10s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy is infuriated at being ignored. “What's wrong with everyone,” she yells. “Are you all too scared to even talk about it? I've got to get home to Kansas!”
(52m16s) <SPOON> Count Sessine turns his head to look elsewhere with regal calm. If he doesn't answer, maybe the bothersome infant will just go away.
(51m58s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy screams at him. “Don't you understand? I've been kidnapped! Isn't anyone going to help me? What kind of crummy place is this, anyway?”
(51m49s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto leers, “And help get me back to Aunty Em's bountiful bmmfff-!” Dorothy slaps him over his jawbone and glares at him.
(50m38s) <SPOON> Count Sessine flicks an ear at the unpleasant noise. “You could try looking in the Museum,” he suggests. He gives a wide, very sharp-toothed, yawn, and bounds off to the Jungle.
(50m12s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy yells after him, “You wimp! You stinking miserable coward! You're just running away.”
(47m7s) The wizened old woman confronts Dorothy and snaps, “Behave yourself, foolish girl. Do you imagine you are the only person who was ever kidnapped here?”
(46m20s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy is confused. “What do you mean? Other people. . .”
(44m18s) The wizened old woman says bitterly, “There's only one here as waltzes on and off the Island whenever She happens to feel like it - - the Watcher.”
(43m51s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto mutters to himself, “I wonder how she got THAT title? Hur hur!”
(43m44s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy is suddenly hopeful. “Maybe she could help me, then?”
(41m52s) The wizened old woman says bitterly, “You think we haven't tried? Over and over? The bitch won't share, and that's the end of that.” She spits on the ground and hobbles away, leaning on her cane.
(41m17s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy can't quite hold back her sniffles. It seems hopeless.
(39m40s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth happening by, mentions that the Riddler might know. The Riddler? Oh, you know - - the Cryptic Questions Joker. He's just the sort who would know of a way off - and not care.
(38m51s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy says eagerly, “How do I find him?”
(37m58s) <SPOON> Count Sessine looking much more like himself, strolls by and hears the end of this. “The Riddler might know,” he suggests. The Riddler? “Oh, you know - - the Cryptic Questions Joker. . .”
(37m47s) <SPOON> Count Sessine says, “He's just the sort who would know of a way off - - and not care.”
(37m36s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth wanders off to let Sessine answer Carroll's questions
(37m7s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy jumps up and down impatiently. “But I have to get home! I just have to. Please? Aunty Em will be so worried about me!”
(37m4s) <SPOON> Count Sessine notes that there is an odd echo. These things happen. . .
(36m14s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull rolls on-stage, out of breath. He whispers, “We already did that. . .”
(36m12s) <SPOON> Count Sessine scratches his ear, thinking. “Well, you might try it from a different outpost. I don't think he hangs around NewHome too much.”
(35m57s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy says eagerly, “But how do I get to a different outpost?”
(35m40s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as a Skull as Toto adds while grinning at Sessine, “These things happen. We already did that.”
(35m35s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull turns into a little image of a dog.
(34m31s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell then ceremoniously transfers his skull cap to Bob. He can suffer in Max's place.
(33m34s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto gives a little doggy smile. “Ah. Well, sometimes other things happen, too. Like when you're a little drunk by Dan's hand.”
(32m52s) <SPOON> Count Sessine assesses her. Little girl, strange little. . . dog? Very much a Newbie. What's the Network thinking of, kidnapping children? The Island is no place for kids.
(32m46s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell turns to Sessine, “So, going to tell her how to find The Riddler?”
(32m17s) <SPOON> Count Sessine says, “Sweetie, I'm going to try and find someone to take care of you. You just stay here for a while and find yourself a place to keep out of trouble, all right?” He vanishes.
(31m26s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy sighs, “Some place where there isn't any trouble. Do you suppose there is such a place, Toto? There must be. Not a place you can get to by a boat or a train. . .”
(30m56s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth cues the slow building background music.
(30m41s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto sniggers, “Too right. Did you see that FAQ? Everyone here uses catapults. Run by effin Midgets. They're crazy, that's all I can say. . .”
(30m27s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto adds, “Cra-zee. Nutso. Totally bonkers.”
(30m27s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy sings wistfully, “Somewhere over the Island / Catapulted high / There are travellers flying,”
(30m14s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto joins in, “Screaming 'I'm gonna die!' ”
(29m49s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy continues, “Somewhere over the Island, / we must go. . .”
(29m27s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto (cynically) “Put our lives in the hands of / Midgets who wish us woe.”
(29m23s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy clasps her little hands and warbles, “Away above the clouds I'll fly / Upon my way to kill the Drive / So nobly. . .”
(29m6s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy goes on singing, “And then as I will start to drop / In fear my heart will try to stop / And then you'll find me.”
(28m49s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto, not singing but grumbling in a voice-over, “And we're doing this, why? Remind me!”
(29m52s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy (continues singing) “Somewhere, crashed on the Island / Battered be,”
(29m37s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto sings to Dorothy, “Just. . . to. . . save a day's travel,”
(29m22s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy, sings back to Toto, “Oh what a fool is me!”
(29m5s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto and Carroll as Dorothy sing in close harmony, “Just because other morons fly. . . / By catapult, then. . .”
(28m55s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy, in a fine solo finish, ends the song: “Why, oh why, should I?”
(28m5s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth stops the soundtrack to allow the resumption of normal dialog.
(27m49s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as Narrator says, “Just as Dorothy and. . . uh, Toto, finish their touching duet, a mob of Midgets swarm onstage.”
(27m29s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan (Fergus) as First Midget says, “Summ'un said 'catapult', like, an that's arskin fort, innit. We'll take this'n.” They all grab onto Dorothy and start lifting her up. She screams.
(26m56s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan (TMM) as Second Midget says scornfully, “Yer 'ead's fokkin brained out. She's on'y a little tyke. Like, million to one agin, innit.”
(26m18s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan “A million to one! It's so fokkin gay it jus' might work!” “Wot you fink this is, like, bleedin Ankh Morpork? Fings ent that fokkin reliable 'ere.”
(25m27s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat as First Midget is deflated. “I rekkon yer right, mate. Like, wot we gonna do? We fokkin need ammo, innit.”
(25m3s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy says uneasily, “You can just let me go, then, right? I'm too little. I'm way too little. . .”
(24m18s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan as Second Midget ignores her protest. “Alls we finds is, like, this minger. Might's well fokkin use 'er.” He starts dragging her and the others join in. She struggles.
(23m54s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull manifests clearly as a skull instead of a cute little doggie, and the Midgets all jump back, briefly alarmed - - or at least startled. “Run, Dorothy!”
(21m53s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll says, “aieeeeeeeee!”
(21m11s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as Narrator says, “Dorothy and Toto run around the town square hotly pursued by Midgets. Bob shouts, 'Quick! Into that shack!' They run inside and slam the door.”
(21m4s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat as First Midget groans, “Awwr, now wot we fokkin gonna do? Draggin ammo out of shacks is Agin the Fokkin Rules. Y'know wot She would do if we fokkin Broke the Rules.”
(20m32s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan as Second Midget snarls, “It'd be bloody worf it if it worked, innit, but that fokkin little shit wouldn' raise a lump ef we hit dead on.”
(20m14s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat as First Midget grouses glumly, “Nuffin evva fokkin works. We bin tryin since the bloody season started. Nuffin.” The midgets mutter in agreement. They all sit on the ground, grumbling.
(19m27s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan as Second Midget jumps up. “Wait!” He paces, waving his arms and sputtering incoherently. Finally he gets it out: “Why don't we. . . why don't we USE THE FOKKIN SHACK?”
(19m13s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat as First Midget stares at Second Midget in dawning wonderment. “Use. . . the shack? Could we?”
(18m46s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan as Second Midget: “Why not? The Rules don't say nuffin, not one single bleedin word, 'bout not USIN shacks.”
(18m12s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat as First Midget grins savagely. “Dude, yer a fokkin genius!” The Midgets hoist the Shack on their shoulders and run off to the Catapult, cheering as they go.
(17m41s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan as Second Midget, on the way out, calls, “I fink She's in Squat Hole right now. 'urry!”
(17m11s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat as First Midget can be heard from somewhere in the vicinity of the Travel Agents, yelling, “An fer gawd's sake, aim the bloody fing right this time.”
(16m56s) <CDAG> Newbie Carroll as Dorothy peers out the window. “Damn, Toto, those are STRONG midgets.”

(16m20s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as Narrator says, “So concludes today's show, the first Act of “The Riddler of Oz”! Will Dorothy die? Will the Shack survive? What is the capital of Uganda? Find out next episode in-
(14m46s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as narrator finishes dramatically, “The Riddler of Oz, Act Two!”
(14m18s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull nods to the others to make a bow.
(13m59s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth adds a subtitle: “What are those Midgets up to?”
(12m46s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull bows.
(12m39s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as narrator continues, “Today's show was sponsored by NewHome Museum, Olliepuck and the letter Z. This has been a Weathervane Players production. Coffee will be served shortly. Goodnight!”
(12m20s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth brings Carroll a bunch of flowers someone left in honor of her acting debut.
(12m5s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan retuns onstage as a midget and bows (as much as a midget can). He transforms back into a jokerzombie and bows again, then consequently falls apart.
(12m3s) <SPOON> Count Sessine observes to no-one in particular, “Apparently they do have an objective of some kind, after all. Who knew?”
(11m34s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull smiles, then frowns. “What, no flowers or treats for the dog?”
(10m58s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth hands Bob a doggie bag full of Scooby-Snacks.
(10m46s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan says, “And no brains for me? Not even anything that rhymes with brains?”
(10m19s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell pats Bob on the head, and offers him one of several flowers people gave him for his portrayal of a Skull.
(9m57s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan would've made many a pun, if he wouldn't be hit with flying tomatoes again.
(9m38s) <QUEST> QuestorPrime Tor NaGoth hands TMM a train, and Fergus a dead chicken.
(9m31s) <SPOON> Count Sessine addresses the assembled audience. “The touching song performed in this episode is now available in the Gallery of the Enquirer, brilliantly sung by our very own Icterid.”
(9m27s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull smiles again. “Yippee!”
(9m10s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell hands MuffinMan a pipe connected to the water-mains.
(8m48s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull as Toto, “Scooby Dooby Doo!” He launches into the air and comes back down with a mini-parachute.
(7m54s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell glances at the audience, “You can talk again, by the way.” He flashes a grin and bows.
(6m58s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan is pelted with tomatoes anyways. “Of course.” He sighs and transforms back to normal. (You know, joker-normal)
(5m53s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull thanks Max for filling in.
(4m37s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell would also like to thank Sessine and MuffinMan for their fillings.
(4m34s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan then congratulates his fellow costars. He especially thanks CC, “Good thing you got here. I would've run out of comments and stalled the play having to be both midgets.”
(3m14s) <CIA> Newbie Cheshire Cat smiles, “It was bloody fukkin' amazin'. Tha' wha' iet wa'.”
(2m37s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell as narrator turns to the audience, “Tune in next time for Act Two, The Riddler of Oz! Different time, different place! See you there!”
(1m44s) <WotWC> Newbie Bob the Skull says, “I'm surprised he showed up. After all, he is Nowhere.”
(22s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell is required by his lawyers to add, “The “different place” is actually Squat Hole, and the “different time” might very well be the same time.”
(2m26s) <SWEET> Announcer Max Dougwell says, “So. . .anybody going to copy our finished performance and put it on the Weathervane Players, so nobody misses it? I think I will!
(19s) <SWEET> Brigadier TheMuffinMan says, “I'd also suggest putting it onto the Wiki of Lies, unless the ImprobableNewsNetwork was already going to do that.”

Continues in Scene Two

Note from CMJ: Quote marks are fixed, mostly. You might need to include an extra line break between lines that both begin and end with a quotation mark. Copy everything into a plain-text editor and do a find-and-replace action to replace the ellipses with three full stops.

Note from Sessine: Three full stops don't work. Unless there are spaces between them, the Wiki still thinks it's an ellipsis. Same with two hyphens, like this: – Without a space between, so: - - the Wiki thinks it's an em-dash. Or an en-dash, or something. At any rate, it doesn't let it through.