I am the very model of a modern Major-General,((Now that this has been posted here, //please// don't post it in-game anymore. Seriously. It's been done to death. It just isn't funny anymore.))((Or is it.))\\ I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,\\ I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical\\ From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;\\ I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,\\ I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,\\ About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,\\ With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.\\ I'm very good at integral and differential calculus;\\ I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:\\ In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,\\ I am the very model of a modern Major-General.\\ I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's;\\ I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,\\ I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,\\ In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous;\\ I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,\\ I know the croaking chorus from The Frogs of Aristophanes!\\ Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,\\ And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.\\ Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform,\\ And tell you ev'ry detail of Caractacus' uniform:\\ In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,\\ I am the very model of a modern Major-General.\\ In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",\\ When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin,\\ When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,\\ And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",\\ When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,\\ When I know more of [[tactics]] than a novice in a nunnery,\\ In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,\\ You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a-gee.\\ For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,\\ Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;\\ But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,\\ I am the very model of a modern Major-General.((try saying that 10 times fast))((Heck try saying that one time fast))((Well, don't be Drunk either.))