====== A Public Health and Safety Warning: The Evil Known as Soap ======
A highly poisonous substance pushed on the public by [[The Government]] and [[Big Soap]] corporations. Soap makes tiny cuts in your skin as you use it, and sometimes have incredibly small [[robot|robots]] mixed inside to take over your body as you sleep.

You shouldn't be bathing, anyway, it'll short out your [[implants|implant]].

Other than being pure [[evil]], soap is able to be bought and sold at [[trading post|trading posts]] all around [[Improbable Island|the island]].