Located in the center of Improbable Island, nearly due north of [[NewHome]] and to the west of [[Kittania]], Improbable Central is both the capital of the Island and the hub of its commerce and social life. [[Rumor]] has it that all rumors start here and are approved by an unrevealed government agency before being released to contestants through [[Dan]] at the [[Prancing SpiderKitty]]. Additionally, the Island's major scientists have their secret enclave here, where they devote their [[time]] to developing new [[weapons]], such as the [[chainsaw]], for use by contestants. [[Clans]] often steal these prototypes before they are ready for general release and can be seen running amok through the streets of the Island's [[cities]] with everything from radioactive cheese sprayers to rainbow-colored Molotov cocktail mixers. Ask around for the [[Science]] Center - If [[you]] can find it, maybe [[you]]'ll be able to buy a devastating weapon prototype((Unless, of course, someone has already stolen it.)). Major attractions in Improbable Central include: * **The Stocks**. Nope((Though you might find the cousin somewhere in [[NewHome]])) * **The Statue**. Also Nope * **Mercenary Camp**. Need some bodyguards? This is the place to hire them. For enough requisition coins and cigarettes, [[you]] can hire [[Insane Jane]], [[Caroline the Speed Medic]], or a [[GRUNT Mobile Weapons Platform]]. These warriors will fight by [[you|your]] side like [[you|your]] own personal army - definitely handy to have around if [[you]] can afford their rates. And may [[the Watcher]] pity anyone who gets in their way. * **[[The Hunter's Lodge]]**. * **[[The Council Offices]]** * **[[The Gauntlet]]**. Exchange [[charm]] for more Hitpoints. * **[[Bank of Improbable]]**. * **[[The Communications Tent]]**. * **Deimos' Haberdashery**. Deimos is a master hat-maker. His wares are expensive, but his customer list includes some of the Island's most dashing citizens. No one is quite sure what purpose his hats serve, but they sure are cute. Deimos ONLY ACCEPTS REQUISITION. Any mention of "Gold" is a sign of Seth's counterfeit currency. Please report problems like this to the Watch. * **Oliver's Jewelry**. Another master artisan, Oliver makes a variety of jewelry with precious stones from the Island's mines.((He denies that the improbability that infuses the Island has affected these stones in any way, and any reports to the contrary are nothing but [[lie|lies]].)) His wares are expensive, but the craftsmanship and the figure [[you]]'ll cut striding through town wearing his jewels make them well worth the cost. According to [[rumor]], his jewelry provides protection against some types of [[monster]], but more recent research has proven it just makes [[you]] more attractive to [[Thieving Squat Bastards]]. Oliver believes that the Island is ruled by a [[king]]. * **Cadfael's Furniture **. Cadfael sells furniture you can install in your [[dwellings for dummies|dwelling]]. You can buy everything from a Couch, Folding bed or Single Bed. Cadfael also has the ability to customize your furniture, for a small extra fee. * **Suzie's Hardware **. Suzie is in charge of [[Places:]]. She can sell you a stake for 100 cigarettes, and will happily rent out toolboxes for Carpentry, Masonry or Decorating, at the cost of 1 cig per day. * **Petra's Tattoo Parlor**. [[Petra]] offers some of the best tattoo art on the Island. Symbols, tigers, hummingbirds - she does it all. Her work is affordable but her shop could be more sanitary.((Reports of massive blood and [[hp|hit point]] loss are common.)) * **[[Sheila's Shack O'Shiny]]**. * **[[eBoy's|eBoy's Trading Station]]**. * **[[Prancing SpiderKitty|The Prancing SpiderKitty]]**. Improbable Central's favourite pub. A regular visit to the PSK is vital to your survival on Improbable Island. Get drunk! Gamble all your cigarettes! Flirt with the Staff! Listen to the Bard! * **[[Mike's Chop Shop]]**. Mike sells the Haiks TR-25 Scrambler for 100 Cigarettes. * **[[Common Ground]]**. * **Curious Looking Rock**. [[Magic|Magical]] forces prevent [[newbies|new contestants]] from seeing this fixture of the city's landscape for what it is. For the lucky few who have the experience, gatherings at the Curious Looking Rock are events to be remembered. * **[[Clan Halls]]**. * **The Old Church**. Nope * **Villager's Hut**. The old woman who lives in this tiny hut in the city's western residential quadrant is seldom seen but is renown for her generosity. She prepares bags of healthy candies and cookies for the city's children, and has been known to allow older contestants to sample a bag or two as well. But don't be greedy - [[you]] know what [[you|your]] mother told [[you]] about eating too much candy before storming into the [[jungle]] to fight [[monster]]. A couple of bags may give [[you]] a sugar rush, but too many will make [[you]] sick.((It is recommended to eat two candies, and then eat two more. Eating three or four at a time can may result in baaaaad things.)) Improbable Central is a bustling place, full of contestants coming and going, and Island officials hustling through on their various errands of Island business. Travelers should sure to have their caricature drawn by local artists beside the statute of the Island's latest hero in the town square - and be sure to check out the [[stocks]]. The city's tallest spires offer terrific views of the forests to the east and southwest, as well as the swamps and river to the north. Head out from Improbable Central in any direction, and adventure awaits!